Friday 10 February 2012

cold

Today was a rather interesting day on the realms of self discover, when it started or a few hours after it started I came to realize that I am a cold  person without the bare minimum of feeling required even for people you barely tolerate which would be sympathy or pity at the least , but as i stood there in front of the person who for one reason or another required both sympathy and pity i felt nothing it all looked like a dramatic propaganda which then resulted in a large waste of money, the reason that lead to that was apparently fear.

what i can not at all comprehend is how a person can go on and on and on and on about how strong and fearless they are then at the slightest not even blow but passing by of a hint of fear you succumb to it completely?
that is illogical to me without valid reason for fear it should not exist, and the only valid fear is your ( this includes immediate family loved ones and close friends ) literal destruction , I am talking about comic book laser beam that turns you in to a pile of dust destruction...unless it is then there is nothing really to fear not really anything you can face you can usually resolve..... so maybe i am cold and too logical who knows...

in saying that a dear friend surprised me today and a variety of emotions decided to show up within me, stubbornness and pride were of course among the crowd of feelings  but I also wanted to show this friend that the efforts are appreciated and i am very grateful to have this person in my life.

which brings me to think that may be i am not as cold as i thought... yes i confuse my self at times,i wonder how much i confuse my friends hmmm.

on another note Threading was not completely successful! oh yes perhaps my poor wee hairs were traumatically pulled out of my face but there are some survivors and in celebrations i will shave! although my face still feels as rough as a frozen badgers arse.

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