rant

Patience is something I am currently running out of last night did not go well I was pretty much ambushed/betrayed or it felt like that anyway so my realm of Possibilities is going on vacation right now, the way I see it I am guilty of the crime and thus I will do the time my punishment is drugs for something I am convinced I do not have ( of course the counter to that is no crazy person thinks they are crazy)

What i do / How my therapist interprets it:



I put other first/You are a monster with yourself

I delay things for me in anticipation of problems by other people that will need to be dealt with/You are a monster to yourself that is trying to kill  yourself

I am not bonding/forming a friendship with her/You are incapable of forming relationships you will screw up any romantic relationship with men or women ( i'm not even bi you idiot)

I do not yell at her when she yells at me/You are incapable of expressing anger

I was not compassionate when she was sad (apparently because i am such a difficult person ) and my only response was I apologize hope it gets better/ You do not feel anything you can not feel.

I try to understand by making statements and asking questions/You do not grasp the reality of things and are too argumentative, you use arguments to run away ( run away from what !!!i would rather use a bike or getaway car it would be much cooler)

I decide to keep my thoughts to myself/You are Arrogant and pompous

I am honest/You are manipulative

I stop taking medication I find not making a difference and decide to stop wasting money on courses I do not need/You only do what you want

I am a gentleman that chooses to not objectify women/You are sexually immature in fact you have the sexual maturity of a 2 year old.

I believe in my beliefs/You are too stubborn and you manipulate your own self

of course I could just say fuck it , go home get a job, put off university for another year or 2 till i save up the price for the final year of tuition and stop wasting precious time, but i made somebody a promise and I refuse to disappoint that person just because i could not take my punishment like a man just because i could not take a lil pressure, nope nope can't have that so I will force some patience in to existence  i will take the stupid drugs to prove i am right and try to control my temper, thank you for listening!